In my observation, the thing which most separates us from one another is the unseen childhood wounds we carry. At our core, we feel somehow damaged, handicapped, afraid and most definitely ashamed of who we are.
So we compensate. First we numb out the initial, deeply imbedded message that we are faulty… at fault for all the negative experiences that we have experienced. We hide them like flawed, black diamonds from ourselves and from others.
” No one can see this,” we say into our alone space.
And that is where the clawing, striving, anxiety fuelled attempt at validation begins.
We are working feverishly to show others that we are special. Our power is worn in our clothing; in our facebook posts; in our manipulation of other people; in our following others who promise to anoint us as “not flawed.”
It is a Caucus Race exactly as Lewis Carrol has created for us to see. We run faster and faster on the sand platform of our lives trying to get dry. But the one thing we could do to make ourselves achieve that goal is not understood or even seen.
Stop running where the waves are washing you wet. Stop running in the circle with all of the others who have released their individuality and mindfulness.
We are fuelled by adrenalin because we are literally running for our lives. We want to dry out. We want to be free of the stinging waves of our own thoughts. But we want to follow someone, that missing parent figure or anyone who looks confident, around and around in circles.
Taking the tablets with buy viagra cheapest a glass of water Stop the medicine if you find any change in behaviour Strictly follow the instruction provided by your GP and you have not obtained the medicine without a solution then you ought not need to stress excessively over genuine dangers and symptoms. Are you spending hours of sleepless nights just thinking how to get rid levitra uk of ED. This also garnered consumers from various population from different parts of the globe. Check Out Your pharmacy store cheap levitra This instant and long lasting solution need to be maintained cialis free consultation properly. So the central issue is that we release the anxiety by creating more anxiety. We poke an area that should be alive and feel only numbness so we do something to numb down the realization that we cannot feel. We seek to find joy by chasing pleasure and the waves keep splashing over us. We are dripping heaviness once again.
We judge others. We see someone who is not good enough so that we can feel good enough. We point to others who are lost in mindless, repetitive trances of consumerism and distraction in order to black out our own mirror.
When we can settle down, stop running, figure out what it is that drives our fear and anxiety, we have a place to begin.
None of us is special. No one person can escape the pain of being a human being. No one person is living life without the gaping wounds of childhood, the breath taking dullness of shame that is internalized, no one person is extra-ordinary.
All of us are busy dressing up… like children. We dress up to look bigger, more powerful. And when that doesn’t work we hide in some dark closet. The two extremes are what most try out as a mode of operation in life. And neither works.
Each of us was born with the ability to intuit, to receive messages, to see with clear vision. Each of us was born with the ability to step forward and say, “I hurt. I disappoint myself. I want to be a loving being.” Each of us has magical powers and dark remorse.
Only when we can work with our own particular scars can we get to a place wherein we can let go of the comparisons. None of us is special, or more important, of more value. The entire issue of power, reputation, financial strength grows up in a society that can no longer connect to the earth. We begin to see ourselves as “consumer items.” When we are not grounded and connected in spirit, we ask others to put a price tag on us, as if we were a factory product.
“Tell me what I am worth,” the injured soul says.
Knowing that we all are in soul school and none of us escapes without the injuries, scars and lessons of being in a human body means we can relax. Now we can relax and simply do what we have been put here to do… which is to love. It is everything.